Will I live to be eighty?

I recently picked a new primary care physician.  After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing “fairly well for my age.”

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking him, “Do you think I’ll live to be 80?”

He asked, “Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer/wine?”

“Oh no,” I replied.  “I’m not doing either.”

Then he asked, “Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?”

I said, “No, my other Doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!”

“Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?”

“No, I don’t,” I said.

He asked, “Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?”

“No,” I said.  “I don’t do any of those things.”

He looked at me and said, “Then why do you give a shit if you live to be 80?”