When you’re drunk…

Thanks, but I don’t want to sleep with you.
Nope, no more drinks for me, I’ve reached my limit.
Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
Please take the shooters back; let’s have water.
Good evening officer, isn’t it lovely out tonight?
I’m not interested in fighting you.
Oh, I just couldn’t – no one wants to hear me sing.
Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have zero coordination.
Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to vomit in the street.
I must be going home now as I have work in the morning.
Look, it would be great to have sex with you, but I hardly know you and we will only feel really embarrassed and awkward in the morning.
That guy is looking at my girlfriend but I am sure its just because he knows her or something.
That chair looks wobbly and dangerous and I certainly wouldn’t try balancing on it with this short skirt on in case I fell off.
I must get to my bed, as I could never have a really good sleep in that hedge.

via email from Renee Bailey, Wed, 12 Jan 2005 22:29:19 -0600

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