- If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.
- It's only unethical if you get caught.
- The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts
- Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security.
- Sure, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.
- If you think we're a bad firm, you should see our rivals! (We suck less!)
- Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them.
- We put the "k" in "kwality"
- If something doesn't feel right, you're not feeling the right thing.
- Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity
- A person who smiles in the face of adversity… probably has a scapegoat.
- If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos…then you probably haven't completely understood the situation.
- ABANDON ALL HOPE, ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE…
- We make great money! We have great benefits! We do no work! We are union members!
- 2 days without a Human Rights Violation!
- Your job is still better than asking "You want fries with that?"
- We are Microsoft. Resistance is futile.
- Plagiarism saves time.
- If at first you don't succeed – try management.
- At least you're not being probed by aliens.
- Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
- This can't go on for ever, even the Third Reich only lasted 12 years
- Never quit until you have another job.
- TEAMWORK … means never having to take all the blame yourself.