You know you are in ARIZONA when:
- You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
- You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
- You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
- You can make instant sun tea.
- You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
- The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a bit chilly.
- You discover that in July it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
- You discover that you can get sunburn through your car window.
- You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
- Hot water now comes out of both taps.
- It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
- You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
- You shiver and get goose-bumps as you get out of the swimming pool.
- No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
- Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?
- You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
It's so hot in Arizona:
- The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
- The potatoes cook underground and all you have to do to have lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
- Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard boiled eggs.
It's so dry in Arizona:
- The cows are giving evaporated milk.
- The trees are whistlin'? for the dogs.
A sad Arizonan once prayed, "I wish it would rain – not so much for me, cuz I've seen it, but for my 7-year old."