Mildred

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both barely large enough to see over the dashboard. As they cruised along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through.

This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it.

She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us."

Mildred turned to her and cried, "Oh shit! Am I driving?"