Author: Dr Wingnut
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Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty but aren't:
Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty In Law But Aren't:Have you looked through her briefs?He is one hard judge!Counselor, let's do it in chambers.His attorney withdrew at the last minute.Is it a penal offense?Better leave the handcuffs on.For $320.00 an hour, she better be good!Can you get him to drop his suit?The judge gave her…
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Twas the night before….
Twas the night before crisis,And behind White House doors,Not a creature was stirring,Especially Al Gore.The interns were nestled,Dressed in their berets,In hopes that Saint Bubba Would come out to play.When on the East Lawn,There arose such a clatter,Even Sam DonaldsonLost control of his bladder. Away to our TVsWe flew like a flash,There's a special report,And…
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Tweety bird
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Two Cycling Nuns
It's late afternoon and two nuns are riding their rickety bikes on the back streets of Rome. As the sun dips below the skyline and dusk begins to descend, the more nervous of the two sisters turns around toward the other and says, "I've never come this way before."The other nun replies, "Don't worry, dear;…
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United folks
An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo. This is a TRUE story.A crowded United flight was canceled. A single agent was rebooking a line of inconvenienced travelers.Suddenly an angry…
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US Department of Fish and Wildlife
According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated: "Wash. Biol. Surv." until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper:Dear Sirs:While…
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Useful Work Phrases:
How about never? Is never good for you?You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.The fact that no one understands…