Dr Wingnut

Author: Dr Wingnut

  • The Cross-Torture or teaching Aid?

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A ten year old boy was failing math.  His parents tried everything from tutors to hypnosis, but to no avail.  Finally, at the insistence of a family friend, they decided to enroll their son in a private Catholic school.After the first day, the boy's parents were surprised when he walked in after school with a…

  • THE DARWIN AWARDS

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    THE DARWIN AWARDS are bestowed every year upon (the remains of) that individual, who through single-minded self-sacrifice, has done the most to remove undesirable elements from the human gene pool.Runners-up:[AP, Mammoth Lakes] A San Anselmo man died yesterday when he hit a lift tower at the Mammoth Mountain ski area while riding down the slope…

  • The difference between men and women:

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    A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road.  As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells: PIG!!The man immediately leans out his window and replies with "BITCH!"They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner…

  • The differences

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    All babies start out with the same number of raw cells which, over nine months, develop into a complete female baby.Sometimes a problem occurs when cells are instructed by the little chromosomes to make a male baby instead.  Because there are only so many cells to go around, the cells necessary to develop a male's…

  • THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN & WOMEN . . .

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    NICKNAMES:If Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.  But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a pint, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Useless.EATING OUT:When the bill arrives, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack…

  • The Drunken Physician

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    Dr Wingnut
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    The patient was lying in bed, still groggy from the effects of the recent operation. His doctor came in, looking very glum."I can't be sure what's wrong with you," the doctor said.  "I think it's the drinking.""Okay," the patient said.  "Can we get an opinion from a doctor who's sober?"

  • The Egg…

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    Dr Wingnut
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    If you think life is bad… How would you like to be an egg?You only get laid once.You only get eaten once.It takes 4 minutes to get hard.Only 2 minutes to get soft.You share your box with 11 other guys.But worst of all, the only chick that ever saton your face was your mother.So cheer…