Month: April 2007
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Deception
Most of our platitudes notwithstanding, self-deception remains the most difficult deception.Joan Didion
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Tax Time
A woman walks into an accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.The accountant says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask you a few questions.” He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, “what is your occupation?”“I’m a whore,” she says.The accountant is somewhat taken back…
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Form v Content
Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.Terry Pratchett
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Computer Problem
“Hello, technical support, how can I help you?”LADY: “Last night my computer started making a lot of hissing noise at me so I shut it down. This morning when I turned it on the computer started hissing and cracking, then started smoking and a bad smell, then nothing.”SUPPORT: “I will have a technician come over…
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Wacky Web Friday
Mario Bros theme on many instruments Super Mario in LegosSuper Mario on trombonesRobots from found materialsDraw-a-pig personality testCreative billboardsTrucks from a cameraphone in DubaiGreat cross-section of New York CityFeaking NazisDanny Brown skis DenaliHow 3-card monte worksRemove PDA logos with sugar Ancient history: Internet trends from 1994Past future-visions of the planets, starting with MercuryBathroom humorDating tips…
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Never question a drunk!
I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected:A half-gallon of 2% milk,A carton of eggs,A quart of orange juice,A head of romaine lettuce,A 2 lb. can of coffee, andA 1 lb. package of bacon.As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind me watched as…