Year: 2005
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Twenty ways to say “No”
I am in the middle of several projectsI am not comfortable with thatI am not taking on any new responsibilitiesI am not the most qualified person for the jobI do not enjoy that kind of workI do not have any more room in my calendarI hate to split my attention among projectsI have another commitmentI…
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Impossible?
It may seem impossible to imagine that a technologically advanced society could choose, in essence, to destroy itself, but that is what we are now in the process of doing.Elizabeth Kolbert, “The Climate of Man,” New Yorker, May 9 2005
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Governmentium
A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named “Governmentium.” It has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.These 312 particles are held together by binding particles called…
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Hope
‘Hope’ is the thing with feathersThat perches in the soulAnd sings the tune without the wordsAnd never stops—at all.Emily Dickinson
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At the store
A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the little girl asked for cookies and her mother told her, “No.” The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, “Now Monica, we just have…
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Different how?
Experts agree that the best type of computer for your individual needs is one that comes on the market about two days after you actually purchase some other computer.Dave BarryHow is this different from every other purchase I have ever made?
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Illogical sales campaign of the year
One of the largest hospitals in Saint Paul, Regions Hospital has these billboards around the city with the following tag line: “We treat everything as critical.” This has got to be one of the worst sales campaigns of the Century. If they treat everything as critical, then they treat everything the same, therefore nothing is…