Month: August 2004
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Arizona Barbie
Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls exclusively for the Arizona market:Ahwatukee Barbie This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, platinum credit card, and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You…
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Family news
Jim and Edna ( I think they’re your aunt and uncle on your mother’s side ) were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, uncle Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Aunt Edna…
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Father knows best
In his memoirs, A World Transformed, written five years ago, George H.W. Bush wrote the following to explain why he didn’t go after Saddam Hussein at the end of the Gulf War:“Trying to eliminate Saddam…would have incurred incalculable human and political costs. We would have been forced to occupy Baghdad and, in effect, rule Iraq….There…
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Life
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.Mark Twain
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Don’t we all…
I was a little offended when I used the men’s room at Home Depot last week and a sign by the urinals said, “We can rent you the best tool to do the job!” Hell, I thought I had it in my hand!via email from Anonymous John, Mon, 30 Aug 2004 19:12:38 -0400
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Failure
I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure — try to please everybody.Herbert Bayard Swope