Month: January 2001
-
Smitten
A man was dining at a fancy restaurant and there was a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He kept checking her out surreptitiously, but lacked the nerve to talk to her. Suddenly, she sneezed and her glass eye went flying out of its socket towards the man. He caught it reflexively and handed…
-
Fords
Three brothers invented the air conditioning unit for the car. They went to Henry Ford to sell their invention, and he immediately knew the value that it had. Only one problem: they insisted that their name appear on the air conditioner. Because they were Jewish, Ford refused to do this, being a well known bigot. …
-
Corporate Sports
Read the following six statements and the amazing conclusion they lead to:The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL. The sport of choice for the maintenance level employees is BOWLING. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL. The sport of choice for middle…
-
The Kennebunkport Hillbillies
Just in time for the Bush inauguration, also known as the "Comedians' Guaranteed Employment Act (CGEA)," (Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies theme song)Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy named Bush.His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.He drank like a fish while he drove round all…
-
STEP THREE:
Made adecision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.Many of us said to our Maker, AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM: 'God, I offer myself to Thee — to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self,…