Month: October 2000

Three old ladies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. About then an old man walked by, and one of the old ladies said, "We bet we can tell how old you are."The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess my age."One of the old ladies said: "Sure we can.…

Here is the transcript of an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations, 10-October-1995.Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say…

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."The woman below replied, "You are…

How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.How do you get holy water? You boil the hell out of it.What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall? Dam!What do eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? PolaroidsWhat do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A…

JOB DESCRIPTION:Long term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment.  Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work various hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.  Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy…

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both barely large enough to see over the dashboard. As they cruised along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through.The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn…