Dr Wingnut

Month: October 2000

  • Saturday Night, Jump or Leap?

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Close your eyes and imagine this.No wait, your reading my e-mail.Imagine if you will, sitting in a small seafood restaurant in Florida with Phyllis, Aunt Marge Churchill and Ruth Buckley.  What a nice group to be having lunch with.It’s the first Saturday in April and I’m visiting from the north.Ah, the first Saturday in April…

  • The Shepherd

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A shepherd was herding his flocks in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand new Jeep Cherokee advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and a YSL tie leaned out of the window and asked our shepherd: "If I can…

  • Children's proverbs

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you.Better to be safe than……………punch a 5th graderStrike while the…………………Bug is closeIt's always darkest before………..Daylight Savings TimeNever underestimate…

  • Presidential Debates

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    Dr Wingnut
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    For those who didn't have time to watch the upcoming presidential debates, I've prepared this transcript of what was said:Jim Lehrer:Welcome to the presidential debate between Vice President Al Gore and Gov. George W. Bush. The candidates have agreed on these rules: I will ask a question. The candidate will ignore the question and deliver…

  • Begosh and Begorah

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    Dr Wingnut
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    An Irish bloke goes to the doctor, "Dactor, it's me ahrse. I'd loik ya ta teyhk a look, if ya woot".So the doctor gets him to drop his pants and takes a look. "Incredible" he says, "there is a $20 note lodged up here"Tentatively he eases the twenty out of the man's bottom, and then…

  • Funny Crazy Eights

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    Dr Wingnut
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    RulesSingle Deck = 4 peopleDouble Deck = 6 or moreDeal each player 8 cardsTurn one card upNext player plays same suit or same face value.  If you can't follow suit, draw a card.Jack is wild.  Can play anytime.  Can name own suit.Ace = Reverses the play until another Ace is played7 = Next player loses…

  • Prayer for friends

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Father, I ask you to bless my friends reading this right now. I am asking You to minister to their spirit at this very moment.Where there is pain, give them Your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubting, release a renewed confidence in Your ability to work through them.Where there is tiredness, or exhaustion, I…