Month: August 2000

Ads in BillsHave you ever noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now?  Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them.  I get back at them.  I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in.  Coffee grinds, banana peels…I write, "Could you throw…

If Fed Ex and UPS* were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses…

Two Texans were seated at the end of a bar when a young lady seated a few stools up began to choke on a piece of hamburger.  She was turning blue and obviously in serious respiratory distress.One Texan said to the other, "That gal is having a bad time!"The other Texan agreed and said "Yep,…

It only takes about 30 seconds.  Don't cheat!Think of a letter between A and T.Repeat it out loud as you scroll downKeep going!Think of an animal that begins with that letter.  Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.Think of a man's/woman's name that begins with the last letter in that animal.  Say it out…

Just let it scroll ! ! !HOLD THE DOWN ARROW AND KEEP GOING*    hi people*    hi people*    hi people*    hi people*    hi people*    hi people*     hi people*     hi people*       hi people*         hi people*           hi people *             hi people *              hi people *              hi  people *             hi people *            hi people *          hi people *         hi people *       hi people *     hi people *     hi people *      hi people *       hi people *         hi people *           hi people *             hi people *              hi people *              hi people *             hi people *            hi people *          hi people *         hi people *       hi people *      hi people *     hi people *    hi people *    hi people *    hi people *    hi people *    hi people *    hi peopl e *    hi peopl   e *    hi peopl    e *    hi peop l    e *    hi peop  l    e *    hi peop   l    e *    hi peop    l    e *    hi peo p    l    e *    hi peo  p    l    e *    hi peo   p    l    e *    hi peo    p    l    e *    hi pe o    p    l    e…

A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen!  Thirteen!  Thirteen!"Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in.  Someone inside pokes him in the eye.Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting, "Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!"

If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.It's only unethical if you get caught.The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cutsDoing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen…