Month: August 2000
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Whale of a tale
A male whale and a female whale were swimming off the coast of Japan when they noticed a whaling ship. The male whale recognized it as the same ship that had harpooned his father many years earlier.He said to the female whale, “Let’s both swim under the ship and blow out our air holes at…
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Welsh radio interview
Excerpt from a recent live radio interview on one of the regional Welsh stations.A female newscaster is interviewing the leader of a Youth club:Interviewer: So, Mr. Jones, what are you going to do with these children on this adventure holiday?Jones: We're going to teach them climbing, abseiling, canoeing, archery, shooting…Interviewer: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible…
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Welcome to Dublin
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.The bartender asks him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I…
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Welcome to Boston
You know you’re from Boston if…You think of Philadelphia as the midwest.You think it’s your God-given right to cut someone off in traffic.You think there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R’s).You think three straight days of 90+ temperatures is a heat wave.All your pets are named after Celtics or Bruins.You refer to…
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Welcome to Atlantic City
A TRUE STORY IN ATLANTIC CITY NJ (WAS IN THE PAPER)On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her…
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Weird Laws
Minnesota:It is illegal to tease skunks.Every man in Brainerd is required by law to grow a beard.Michigan: A state law stipulates that a woman's hair legally belongs to her husband.Under state law, dentists are officially classified as "mechanics."In Clawson, it is legal for a man to "sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens."New…
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Watching TV
One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss them in the air, then catch them in his mouth. In the middle of catching one, his wife asked a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear. He tried and tried to dig it…