Dr Wingnut

Month: March 2000

  • Adam & Eve

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    Dr Wingnut
    in

    One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God…"Lord, I have a problem!""What's the problem, Eve?""Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy.""Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above."Lord, I…

  • Hilarious 800 number

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Hey, ya'all, (or is it "y'all"?), try calling this 800 number and listening to their voice mail system up to the point when they ask you to pick an extension. When you get there, hang up. It will be worth it. The number is +1 (800) 578.7453.via eMail from Jeffrey L. Patten, Esq., Thu, 16…

  • I know this is true

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    Dr Wingnut
    in

    I was on my way to the post office to pick up my case of free M&M's (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other people, celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in Roman numerals), when I ran into a friend whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering…

  • Not all blondes are woman

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.What's up?" he says."I'm having a heart attack." Cries the woman.He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, His 4-year-old son comes…

  • Rose's Dream

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    Dr Wingnut
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    The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us toget to know someone we didn’t already know.  I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.  I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire…

  • Gone Fishin'

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    Dr Wingnut
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    A fisherman's wife gave birth to twin boys. When the babies were side by side, they always looked in opposite directions, so they were named Forward and Away. Years later the fisherman took his sons fishing, but they didn't return.Months passed, and the wife finally spotted her husband plodding sadly up the beach. He explained…

  • Dear Abby

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    Dr Wingnut
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    Letters actually sent to abbyDear Abby,A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into their apartment or come out. Do you think they…